I am furious about pay inequality and I support left leaning policies about women in the workplace and education. I have worked for many women who have been incredible bosses. Women have every right to be considered for promotion, pay raises, and opportunity in the workplace. When women are educated the world is a better place. No woman or girl should be denied education, receive less opportunities for education and be reconciled to sub-standard educational achievements compared to men.
Women change the world. And not just one baby at a time. Over the last two months my wifes charity has raised nearly $5,000 for two different families suffering catastrophic challenges. She is changing peoples lives on a very local level. Rosa Parks changed the lives of millions. Women or men do not need to be Noble prize winners to make a difference. But women will never know that if they are not empowered to leave the home, explore their strengths and weaknesses, and find more passions than family. It’s OK to be passionate about family and something else. In fact I highly recommend it.
I feel this way not only because I have worked for amazing women, am married to the most capable person on the planet and am the father to two beautiful, intelligent, motivated and gifted young girls – but also because my mother, grandmother, female cousins and many aunts are wildly successful entrepreneurs, business women and community leaders. My life has been surrounded by women who are simply put – amazing.
I don’t know how to be more blunt, but if a woman in 2014 is given less opportunity for anything – turned down for a job or promotion, not allowed to participate in athletics, told no for any reason in anything just because of her gender – it is unacceptable and we are all accountable for it. There is no excuse for gender inequality at all.
That includes sexuality. But Feminism has it backwards. Instead of calling for women to be more expressive with their bodies, we should be calling for men to be more chaste. Instead of telling women that their breasts are equal to a mans chest, and as such it is OK to walk around topless, is a lie. Instead of telling women it is OK to sleep around like men have for generations, we need to call on men to be faithful and stop holding a double standard. Instead of telling women that being naked is empowerment, we need to have a reality check with how we all think about our bodies.
While mens and womens bodies are equal in value , they are not the same. In America those differences are primarily sexual. This is not a bad thing unless it leads to the sexualization of the entire person which dehumanizes that person. I am not a psychologist, therapist or psychiatrist. But I am a person and I know when I see a naked body I am rarely admiring the smile or way they did their hair. You got it…I am looking at the privates or making comparisons. That is until I look away from feeling disgusted or ashamed.
Recently an email came into my inbox. This email was from a trusted blog I subscribe to (used to) and the email contained an image of a certain celebrity who was completely naked except for a skinny black bars across her nipples and genitalia. She is gorgeous and very attractive. But when presented naked I was not thinking of her. I was thinking of her boobs and vagina. It was horrible. I did not want to think of her like that (or at all as a matter of fact) – but I could not get those images out of my mind. I was taken away from thinking of her as a person and led to thinking of her as an object.
One might argue that the more we are exposed to tasteful nudity the less we objectify the human body. I am calling a bluff on that. The only way that will happen is when sexual appetites and passions will be erased. This is a biological and chemical experience. We are born this way. We are going to die this way.
I am going to argue that the more we are exposed to nudity, no matter how tasteful it is intended, the objectification of women will increase at exponential rates. Let me cite an example. Jennifer Lopez is a well accomplished singer, performer, actress and entrepreneur. But when she shakes her booty in her tight pants my 14 year old boys are not thinking about which block she’s from or what award she won. They are thinking, look at that butt. Guess what J-Lo’s brand is with my boys? Her brand is all about her butt. How despicable is that? All her accomplishments and hard work taking second seat to a body part.
Imagine how much greater that brand is when the woman (or man) is naked. Now imagine when more and more women decide to take their clothes off in greater numbers and with greater speed? They begin to develop a brand for all women. Women become branded as boobs, butts and vaginas – objects on a woman, but not the woman.
As father of two girls who I want to be wildly successful in whatever brings them them the most happiness I do not want them to compete against their own bodies for attention, acceptance, accomplishments and desire. So long as feminists include free expression of sexuality and nudity as part of its mantra – I cannot be a supporter. It is unfair, unjust and too demeaning to the value of women and the roles they can and do play in our society. I will not support something that demotes their potential to influence our communities, workplaces, governments and the world.